6 Reasons the Dentist ISN'T the Devil

There has been a lot of speculation going around Hartford, CT that the dentist may actually be the devil.  Let me clear that up for you: He's not. Would you like some more proof?  How about a list?  I'll give you a list:
6 Reasons the Dentist isn't the Devil:

1. The devil never went to dental school.  Getting in is too hard.
2. The devil hates anesthetic, if it was up to him he'd skip straight to the drilling.
3. Your dentist doesn't have horns, which the film Legend has firmly established that the devil does have.
4. Your dentist doesn't have an evil laugh when you squirm.  (He doesn't does he??)
5. Your dentist accepts dental insurance and it is a wide known fact that the devil never accepts insurance.
6. The devil would rather you keep that cavity

See?  Are you convinced now?  Your dentist clearly isn't the devil, I can understand if you hate him, but that isn't the same thing.  I hate the police and the only crime I've ever committed was driving an unregistered car.  That was it.  And I got pulled over on my birthday.  But I still don't think that that policeman was the devil.  That would be ridiculous.